just might go up to him one day. I can't take this anymore, wtf. I might seriously go up.. and be like "Hi. I think you're cute. Let's be friends. HOLLA."

Lol, just kidding not exactly like that, but I'm really tired to waiting for something to happen.

Should be doing essay. Lol

But anyways, I know it's only October but it's funny reading all the things people wrote on the Davidson Halls 2009-2010 forum on Facebook. You can tell that everyone definitely had the freshman jitters about the anticipation about our dorm rooms.

How someone's friend described Davidson (who lived there before):  "You'll be far from every other freshman dorms. You'll have your own bus stop which is nice, it's all one floor, you're going to complain alot (ie caged up windows, no AC, looks like a concentration camp) but because of the complaints, you and your fellow dormmates are goin to be close as hell, since it's all one floor, narnia is just a few steps away, and you'll have lotsa fun."

I also love how everyone in A & D were freaking out that it was all guys (A) and all girls (D).  Most people were desperately asking people to switch into the co-ed ones.

.. and honestly, Narnia is seriously just a few steps away.

how tempting it is to look at his facebook and xanga when you have nothing to do?! Ugh. I'm happy though because me and friend actually went to his dorm building (with reason of course)! We have a friend that lives in the same building and they were having a halloween party, but of course our friend was going to frat party T_T so he wasn't there. The guy lives across the building...and we didn't really have a reason to go there, plus these girls were giving us stares because we obviously don't live there, but yeah we just left. Didn't get to see him :( I can almost swear that he was still there though because he doesn't, well not like to party, but doesn't want to be tempted to drink and stuff. LMFAO, I know - HOW DO YOU KNOW THIS? But anyways, I met a few guys from a couple buildings down. This one guy in particular is pretty cool :) Funny how he still remembered my name even though I only met him once before .. and I was kind of an asshole to him. He added me on facebook already, lol! But yeah, anyways.

Class at 8. Peaceeee.

I can't do this essay. It's due tomorow, but honestly it's just not happening. The past two days were quite interesting. Really interesting in fact. I don't even know where to begin.  I'll write about it fully one day, but for now I'll just talk about one thing.

I saw him three times today. What the hell? I never even see him once. How the heck did I get to see him THREE times today? Oh my gosh. I feel kind of weird now because my friend was pushing me to go look at him and even go talk to him! Ugh. I'm not that kind of girl. I wish...sometimes, but I'm not. Anyways, when my friend MADE me go back around to go get some apples (only so we had a reason to look at him again) I think some of his friends noticed that we were looking at him. Add onto the fact that when I saw him during lunch my roommate definitely sprinted to go see what he looked like. I feel like one of those dweeb stalker girls who has this secret crush on a guy that she'll never get with. Oh wait... THIS IS WHAT IT IS! Ugh T_T I definitely don't want to be that kind of girl. I mean I just think he's cute and that he has THAT quiet persona about him that makes me go "mmm...". I don't know plus the fact that he actually writes grammatically correct, likes the same music and movies as I do, has a strong faith with God, considers himself a "good guy", sings & plays the guitar. But freaky part? We don't even know each other. Is that even possible for me to be feening about a guy if I don't even know him? Gah. A part of me just wants to get to know him and be friends because I feel like it'll just never happen. Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if he got with my roommate even though she doesn't like him or think he's cute. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I need to stop being like this anyway because my other friend really, really likes him and she was the one who told me about him anyway. I feel like it's her piece, lol. But we shall see - oh God why are you playing these mind games on me?

For now I just gotta keep my head in the game. I need to do better in school. I have to. There is no other alternatives. Ugh alright. Onto my essay.

... to like someone without even knowing them yet, or not really know what he looks like. Sighz.

You know that badass chick who doesn't give a shit, when in reality she cares about it more than any other person. That girl who gives you the middle finger, when in reality all she wants is someone to hug and hold onto.

I know someone like that. We were tight as hell. Now we don't know each other at all. I miss her. I want her to know that despite everything, I still got her back.

I guess it's cos she shared a part of her pain. She gave me a piece of her that not a lot of people get to have. She cried. She laughed. She would come over my house.. just to tell me about her hurt. I don't like to see her like that.

I miss when she would see me in the hallways during school and would jump on me to give me a hug. I miss her optimism.

I miss her humor.

I miss how she used to be.

I miss our friendship.

It's okay.. because life goes on.

I only WISH you happinesssss.

"I do not know anyone who has got to the top without hard work. That is the recipe. It will not always get you to the top, but should get you pretty near."

I have to say... some makeup artists on youtube should really just stick to makeup. Not to be crude (okay well maybe I am..), but honestly when people start throwing the words detail, texture, and fabric with stores like Charlotte Russe and Forever21... kinda makes me want to gag... BLEH.

Everyone's so stressed out and honestly I'm tired and nauseous (due to the constant eating, I don't eat this much nor this early at home) but I'm not .. that stressed out. Or maybe I'm trying not to stress out because I know if I do I'll have a serious meltdown and in the long run I know that I DON'T want to have a meltdown HERE. At home fine, but not here.